Stripes!

ever seen the movie stripes? Bill Murray. ghost bustin ass bill murray.

without further or due, i present the EM-50 Urban assult vehicle! "This is one heavily armed recreational vehicle."


and another, here,
and the big finale...
BOOM BABY.
yeah, so today some dudes came in to the bar that claimed that their GMC camper whatchamacallit was the one used in the movie. it seemed legit, considering their were some original artifacts left over from the movie. like some stickers and shit i guess. there warn't any guns or missals or girls in there, though, and bill murry was only seen on the VHS copy of the movie.
that movie is classic, by the way. and by "that movie" i mean "Bill Murray" is classic.

shantlebanterant

right now, im on my blog period; every 30 days, i have my period and am forced by my vagina to blog and blog and blog some more.

so much for menstruating.
MORE BLOG!!!!
Heres a question for all the lady blog readers--what does, "lavender in the mix," mean to you?
what it means to me is, "time to get freaky with a blender full of cough syrup. and... wait a sec... oh, i mean a gay magazine. kind of like this color, eh? Gay, right?"
eh? ehh?? what about "candles"? what does that mean to you?
what it means to me is, "time to light the menorah; find treasure, and finally, make like jerry seinfeld's cartoon career and go extinct. "

bad jokes, right? well have i got something to show you:


treasure candles--myth? or fact?
that's right, these puppies are real. how many people dreams just came true?? it's hard to believe that there is such a thing, and its so much fun!! so much in fact, that i have sat around a candle for its entirety just to get the charms, and golly, wasn't it exciting.

and now, for something completely different:






UP FROM THE 36 CHAMBERS

guess who's back mo fo's? back in action. til the day i die, die die.

what to say? i've had a lot of zany times while i was away, most of them meth induced. thats right people, METH.

So anyways, i was walking down grand avenue, when i had an epiphany; my goal in life was to go to the loon, buy a scratch off and win as much money as possible. i won $5 dollars, and found out that my purpose in life was meaningless. But i found a way better, more cost efficient life purpose! it was to make as many babies as possible. Any lady, anywhere, anytime. i walked down lyndale until i saw my first lady. i said, "hey lady, you want to have my babies?" she said, "no, but thats a real nice ski mask."

that was about the time i realized that i couldn't possibly get every girl i see pregnant.

i was depressed. i went to bobs java hut and punched a biker in the face. i felt better after that, but i needed to punch someone else. Preferably someone way way weaker then me. right then, i saw a little bitch hipster whom i immediately wanted to punch. i said, "hey little bitch ass hipster... fuck you!" he walked over to me pissed off as hell. i punched him squaa in the nose. he was gushing blood, but somehow i was not fulfilled. I said sorry and walked away, because he wasn't deserving of my punches.


"What to do, what to do," i said to myself, "think Ed, what should you do today?" it was then i discovered i had a gun in my pocket. i thought, "man i was wasted last night. well, i have a gun, i guess i have to shoot it." what a plan! so i walked down to the local urban outfitters to try on the gun. it looked good on me. so good, i shot the mirror. BAM! they kicked me out; i was pissed. i said, " fuck you, you cocksuckers, i didn't do anything" which was false, because i hit the mannequin behind the mirror. "boo hoo"
i said, "for you." IDGAFFFUO (i don't give a flying fuck for urban outfitters) anyways.



And now, for something completely different:






good day